holding hands

Shared by anonymousdiariesofmine

The wind blows onto my face as I close my eyes and tilt my head back. The empty stretch of road in front of us feels inviting. I look at the speedometer in front. It reads 76 kmph and is almost reaching 80 kmph. My focus shifts to the man riding this beauty. I look at his arms, holding on to the bike handle and his fingers tactfully switching gears. This man I love. I reach out from behind and ruffle his hair. He half looks at me and gives a smile. I then wrap my arms around him and hold him tight. He lets go of the left handle and knots his fingers into mine. That’s it. That’s the second I fall for him again. That’s the second when I thank God for letting me have this moment with him. This very minute right here, for riding on this green beauty which makes us feel so liberated and for this man in front, who takes care of me with all that he’s got and makes me feel safe. I reach out and kiss his nape. He laughs in amusement. Somehow it’s my way of saying “I love you”. I do not know if he hears it. But I do hope he feels it. He may not want to acknowledge it ever, but I do hope he remembers that I love him. At least till the while that I’m around in his life.

We’re sitting in a theatre watching a movie. I notice the way he keeps shifting his focus to me every now and then. He reaches out his hand and places it on mine. I hold it close to my face and kiss it. He then leans sideways towards me and kisses my cheek. I blush. Yet I try not to look at him and stare at the large screen in front. I can feel his gaze on me, but I act like I don’t notice him. He leans across once again and kisses my neck. And that’s all it takes for me to go weak in my knees. I close my eyes as I feel his lips on my neck and I succumb to his touch. That barely-a-second passionate kiss feels like a wonderful place to be. I want this man all over me. I want him right now. My dreamy inner self starts her own video tape where I push him back in his seat and lie on his lap and kiss him fiercely with all I’ve got. Before I let her make me zone out I bring my mind back to the reality. I wake up from the arousal-mode and try to focus on the screen in front. He whispers “I love you” into my ear. Oh, what can I ever do to keep this man to myself, and not let anyone else have him, I wonder. And then her face comes to my mind. Her eyes, those beautiful haunting eyes. My heart feels like its on fire. Pain washes over me. My pessimistic inner self switches on the tape that screams “She’s the one for him. You’re not the one. She’s the one for him. You’re not the one….” on a loop and I angrily mute it. My heart feels heavy all of a sudden. “Watch the damn movie.”, I instruct myself.
“What happened?” He asks me. “Nothing” I say as I give him a hug.

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