5 Online Dating Offenses: Male Edition
Shared by our awesome Featured Writer, One Gentleman.
Online dating is now more common than ever, whether we like to agree or disagree with its rate of success. Personally, I think online dating can conclude with a successful partnership, but I am also aware that with every success, we are bound to experience a number of failures.
This is simply a part of life, but also a byproduct of the number’s game. In other words, some things will go in your favor and some things will not. Online dating is no different in that sense, from anything else in life.
With that said, I have a few things to keep in mind, whenever you begin setting up your profiles on dating websites. I encounter different complaints from females on the things they encounter, so I want to present five online dating offenses.
1. Do Not Fabricate Your Profession
I do not believe we should fabricate aspects about our lives, as if we are simply bait, and looking for ways to attract fish at a nearby pond.
If you need to fabricate your profession to look better as a prospect, you should either change your profession or accept the fact that a woman should find you attractive, because of you and not due to your profession.
How far do you think this lie will go? Is it perhaps one date, six or is it 10? If you list yourself as a plastic surgeon on the profile, do you believe she will simply gloss over questions about this medical specialty, while having dinner and getting to know you?
If you are looking for a one-night stand, then I can see your fabrication working for the evening. However, I am sure this lie is something you want to pass off beyond merely one night.
Lies are simply akin to the movement of plates and pressure, when it comes to a volcanic eruption.
With one lie on top of another lie, the pressure of keeping up with your most recent comment will slowly begin to crack this façade. Suddenly, the truth begins to erupt.
Be an adult and own up to the decisions you have made in life. Do not sell yourself short, solely because you think the real you may not be worthy enough.
Refrain from fabricating about your profession. Besides, would you really want someone only liking you because of a fabricated identity?
2. Do Not Lie About Your Height
I did not realize how serious of an offense this was, well, I did not realize how many guys actually commit the offense that is. The first thought that comes to mind is a simple one…why. Why would you fabricate your height? Think about it for a moment.
You are actually going to see this individual in person, and therefore, if you are 5’3 but your profile states that you are 5’9, she will notice. She does not have to be the height police, but trust me…she will notice.
People are more conscious of things, far more than we would like to admit. For instance, after completely overhauling my life during my first semester of college and becoming quite engulfed in the fit lifestyle, I am able to look at someone and give a rather accurate estimate of their weight.
There are women who can tell the difference between a guy who is 5’11 and 6’3. Clearly, this is not representative of all females, but the point is that some people are more conscious of things more than you realize.
Similar to the situation about your profession, the lie will soon reveal itself. Refrain from fabricating about your height, because there is really no point.
Whenever you want to know the answers to whatever you have questions for—go to the source. Well, I did and females do not like when you lie about your height.
3. Do Not Send Generic Private Messages
While browsing through messages, and I can admit this may appear more important to females than with males, reading the same line that everyone else seems to repeat is boring and shows a lack of effort. This is no different from approaching her at the bar, museum, etc.
When you are beginning dialogue through a dating website, it will work to your advantage to refrain from using cheesy lines, which she perhaps heard fifty times in the past hour.
You have amazing eyes.
Wow, you are hot.
Are you made out of honey? ‘Cause you have a mighty sweet a$$.
I made a mistake and somehow forgot my phone number. Would you mind giving me yours?
Whenever you send generic messages, it seems as if you are copying and pasting. In her eyes, you are not showing enough effort, which will separate you from all of the other messages. Remember, the key is to stand out in line, not blend right in.
Pay attention to her profile, where you can find something to write about. By doing this, you are at least showing a little effort. Refrain from sending generic messages. Unless she makes the request, please do not send photos of your buddy (penis) ever.
4. Do Not Lie About Your Relationship Status
This honestly seems like a given, but sometimes what I consider common, is uncommon to others. If you are in a current monogamous relationship, do not pass yourself off as single within the dating profile. In my opinion, you should not be on a dating website for singles to begin with.
Do not bring this woman into your circus. It is completely unfair to her, when she enters the equation expecting that you are also single.
In reality, you have three children and a six-year marriage. Do not waste her time. Though I do not condone cheating, if you are not single but decide to have a dating profile, please make sure that this status is visible on your profile.
5. Do Not Reject Her Rejection
I understand the ego can be a funny thing, especially when blended with the online environment. It gives you this sense of I can do and say whatever I want. However, this is not the time to either become a stalker or have a temper tantrum, because she is not interested.
If she does not answer your private messages, or does respond and rejects your advances, she is not interested. She is telling you to move the bloody heck along mate.
Things do not always go in our favor, and attraction is no different. Do not respond with a tantrum where you begin typing away insults, or stalk her with countless messages every hour…
3:05PM: Hey, did you get my last message?
4:14PM: Hey, it’s Bob again. I sent you a message earlier. Did you get it?
4:59PM: Hey, I was just checking to see if you received my messages. Yeah…did you get them?
6:05PM: Hey. I think the website somehow deleted my messages. So, how are you?
7:20PM: Listen you stupid f***ing b****. Why are you are not responding?
8:00PM: Hi, it’s Bob. I apologize for the previous message. Someone hacked my account.
I understand that rejections hurt, but you cannot be that guy. Accept it, chalk it up as a lesson and move on. Dating is supposed to be fun for both parties.
Fabricating about this, fabricating about that and refusing to take no for an answer, makes the entire process horrific. Do not become the poster child for online dating horror stories. Hopefully, this list will help steer you away from becoming that guy.
This is my perspective. I prefer reading yours. Is this an acceptable list of things guys should refrain from doing, in this era of online dating? What else would you add?
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