One Reason to Stay Away from Negative People

Shared by our awesome Featured Writer, One Gentleman.

As a young man walking the path of a gentleman, in the way that I know best, there will be missteps along the way. I am not perfect now, nor could I attain perfection tomorrow. I surely do not know everything, because each day I learn something new about myself and others.


Whenever I share my perspective on this blog, the perspective is absent of malicious intent. Whenever I provide my take on a subject matter, if it relates to your life in any way, the intent is not to pass judgment.

If the perspective involves what I consider the truth, it is void of malice. The purpose of my truth is to go against what I consider harmful, for one’s personal development.

My way of thinking is based on a collection of readings, observations and mistakes from my own past. Each area has assisted in developing the gentleman I strive to be.

My way of thinking is neither right, nor is it wrong—it is simply my way of thinking.  I can learn from a 75-year-old scholar, as much as I am able to learn from an 8-year-old relative.

I love bespoke and tailored clothing, detest counterfeit goods, consider children as the greatest aspect of humanity, and think ANY person who preys upon children should suffer excruciatingly painful repercussions.

I know that last sentence may bother some people, but I will not retract the statement. I am not going to pray for you, but you are free to ask for repentance. I am sure that sentence may bother some people as well. However, I adore children and their innocence. The thought of what they must endure, at the hands of a monster is mind-numbing.

But I digress.

I was cleaning up as my wife was out shopping, and suddenly, I found myself in deep thought. I put down the cleaning supplies for a bit, picked up my phone and decided to write.

Negative-minded people are like a cancer. You can locate them in all facets of life. This explains why many young boys are unable to become gentlemen. It comes as no surprise, why so many girls prefer looking up to the raunchiest pop star, as opposed to being ladies.

One of my favorite quotes from Albert Einstein involves the message of energy.

Energy cannot be created or destroyed, it can only be changed from one form to another.

Negative-minded people come in many forms. Some are family members, some are our friends, others happen to be your neighbor, fellow church worshipper, business partner, etc. They are like a cancer, because like a cancer, they do not discriminate.

They dress in the clothing of something or someone you should trust, which leads you to lower your guard. They say things to pull their way into your lives. They inquire about how you are doing, and what you are up to. However, their interest has little to do with your well-being.

My dad would often say…

The enemy cannot cause chaos, unless it knows what you are doing.

My uncle would often say…

Don’t let your right hand know what the left is doing, because your friends are few but enemies are many.

These people latch onto you to cause destruction, the best way they know how, which is by asking questions and knowing all about your activities.

They are like a cancer, because when you are doing well, they cannot thrive. However, your downfall is their victory. People fear enemies, but your enemy is not someone to fear.

You must be aware of what I consider destruction wearing improvement’s clothing. Similar to a wolf in sheep’s clothing, these people come bearing gifts, masking themselves as someone who desires your best interest, when in reality, they are seeking the best way to interrupt your progression.

Whatever your progression happens to be, their only goal is to impede it from occurring. As opposed to empowering their own mundane lives, they seek success through your failure.

They are like a cancer, because they cannot thrive when you are doing well. The negative energy from these people, maintains relevance only when it shares itself. Their goal is to spread as much negative energy as possible, to as many as possible.

Through my observation, young boys are unable to become men, let alone gentlemen, because the ones they seek for guidance can only share the only thing they know—complete chaos.

I notice this often, whenever there is a discussion involving something positive. Suddenly, along comes this air of negativity.

After three years of dead-end relationships, you finally encounter an amazing guy you met in your Pilates class. Along comes your single friend, whispering negativity in your ear.

1Are you sure you should trust a guy you met at the gym?

2What is his relationship status on Facebook?

3You know how your past relationships turned out. I don’t think this guy is any different.

4I don’t know, but he might be on the down-low. He works out too much for my taste.

Misery is an occupant who cannot reside in this world, without knowing it has company. – One Gentleman

Your smile triggers her frown. Your joy creates her anger. However, when you are down, she is up. When your relationship ends, she is there smiling with, I told you so.

She is a cancer.

Your life cannot progress in the presence of this disease. It does not matter which person in your life represents this cancer—remove them immediately. Strip them from your life, because you will only make excuses for their actions due to their title.

Negativity…it feeds on your dreams by spreading its vibes, little by little. Eventually you become so infected, you begin spreading the disease to others. Before you know it, that book you were looking to finish, is suddenly scrapped. You begin to doubt your abilities.

Before you know it, the woman you were an inch away from proposing to, is now but a memory. Unexpectedly, you found yourself questioning the relationship.

Before you know it, the relocation overseas for a well-deserved promotion, seems out of reach. An eerie kind of energy surrounds your thoughts, calling the move a bad decision, even though it is one you have worked 12 years to reach.

When positive-minded individuals hear about your dreams and aspirations, they think of ways to encourage your process.

When negative-minded individuals encounter your dreams and aspirations, their only goal is to produce doubt. With doubt, it can make the most gifted individual throw in the towel, moments away from accomplishing their goal.

I matured and experienced the first steps towards a gentleman’s lifestyle, by observing negative and positive energy in action. Positive-minded people are always genuine, even when they say things that you may disagree with.

Negative-minded people always have a hint of hatred, jealousy and disdain, in everything they do, even when they appear agreeable. The signs are subtle and other times, the signs are blatant.

How can you tell?

Well, that topic is for another day. For now, I am interested in knowing two things. Why do you believe many prefer a life of spreading negative energy? Did you ever have to separate yourself from a loved one, all due to their negative energy?

Do you love to write? If you have a story, article, post about dating or love, please Share your Heartbeat! We would love you feature your writing.

Thank you!


22 thoughts on “One Reason to Stay Away from Negative People

  1. I needed to hear this more than anything tonight, thank you so much.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. I’m glad I saw this 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  3. People have negative energy if they have negative thoughts. Why they have negative thoughts is too big for this comment, but if they do have negative thoughts, they have got some work ahead of themselves to change it. Unfortunately, I sometimes have to avoid a family member because of their incessant negativity.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Absolutely enjoyed reading this! I just recently had a group of people who gave me that “final insult” that made me flip the table and go “Enough is enough!” This group were my cancer and I started to really realise that this year. I started to notice how bad about myself I would feel, even though they would be the wrong over something (especially) that wasn’t any of their business, and something they would never actually talk with me about.
    I finally started to hang out with different people and I am having the time of my life and I started to noticed how bad I would feel when I was around this cancerous type group. It’s true, it’s not just our romantic relationships that can be cancerous, it can be our very “good” friends.

    Liked by 2 people

    • It is amazing when you are able to observe this. You begin noticing just how destructive these individuals have been on your life. They completely remove the positive aura from your life, with each encounter. Soon, you begin taking on their negative energy, without realizing it. It simply becomes part of you. This is why we have to separate ourselves. All the best. Thanks for checking out this post.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. wow..this is a very timely message..
    i just had written a piece on negative/toxic people today on my blog, and here i am reading yours.
    can totally relate to this article.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Am I the only one that felt this was generalizing to all people over the world? It goes without saying that one person should be around positive and happy people in order to enjoy themselves more but honestly, when you don’t disclaim it, these types of posts make it sound like you should literally stay away from people who have negative energy.
    I think there is a difference between negative energy and simply devious and envious people who blatantly want to minimize your success and happiness constantly. You can’t simplify it.

    People who have negative energy have negative thoughts, that can go from the simplest to most complex things. Yeah, it’s their job to change that, but they’re not something to be feared.
    Let’s not forget that we all experience negative energy and negative thoughts in our life. I’m sure to you that goes without saying, but to some people it might not.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you for reading this post. An opinion is neither or wrong…it is merely an opinion. For clarification,what was not disclaimed? In your opinion, you feel I cannot simplify it. That is neither wrong or right…it is your opinion. I created the post with various examples of what I am referring to, in regard to the topic.

      “…they’re not something to be feared.” Which sentence of the post said you should fear someone? For clarification, what did you gather from the exact words in the post. Perception plays an important role for each individual when they read or hear something, which is why I am asking for clarification. Once again, thanks for reading the post


  7. I had to threaten to end a friendship with someone who was being horrible to me and using me. Repeatedly I was told i was a bad friend and reminded of everything I had ever done wrong. When the time came, when I needed support, and this friend was not able to deliver, I told her to get the help she needed because I couldn’t do it anymore. The friend chose to get mad, which is fine, but then instead of putting in the effort and taking care of her personal safety, the friendship then disintegrated because of her choice to not make a change. It’s unfortunate but you can only take so much pain and negativity from someone before you have to let them go.

    Liked by 1 person

    • It’s unfortunate but you can only take so much pain and negativity from someone before you have to let them go.”

      Thanks for checking out the post, responding and not creating an erroneous interpretation, to then argue with the interpretation you created as if it were my words. LoL. Your response shows that you know exactly where I was coming from. Some people are simply destructive forces. You have one life–just one.

      There is no replay, pause or rewind. People who desire your downfall and treat your horribly, are not deserving of your time. You can “love” people from a distance, but it is not necessary to have them actively involved in your life, when their intent is to crete destruction. I know where you are coming from in your example, not exactly of course, but I understand the situation in general. It is amazing how some “friends” treat one another.

      As I mentioned, some people are like “cancers.” Did you ever come into contact with them again? Sometimes people change on their own time. Perhaps time apart assisted in their maturity. By no means am I saying you have to reach out…I am just curious if you guys had any contact since.


  8. My thoughts? Too numerous to mention. Just a slice, then: Negativity is a challenge without which achievement would lose its lustre. Example? I bet fire was the invention of a grandson tired by the constant nagging of his nanna, either because she was cold or because her toothless mouth couldn’t handle raw meat. Who should we thank – the grandson who discovered the answer, or the old woman who kept chivying him? Without her we might still be waiting!
    I think you should always seek to understand more about people, rather than dismiss them as a cancer and eject them, metaphorically speaking, from your life. If you are in a relationship with them and you consider them negative the nature of that relationship may have to change, but you can still offer friendship and support. They will have good reasons to speak and think as they do. Life is all about balance. If we wish to ‘progress’ as you put it, we have to keep that equilibrium. That degree of acceptance is, in my humble opinion, the key to true happiness.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you for reading this post and sharing your response. It is a pleasure sharing my perspective, thus my opinion on different topics. “Nagging” due to being cold, or because your toothless mouth cannot chew through meat is not the same as saying, “I wish that you fail in life.” “Nagging” because of cold weather, where I then purchase you a coat is not the same as finding joy, whenever I fail at a goal. Having difficulty with chewing, where I then discover a method of creating false teeth, is not the same as telling me, regardless of the aspiration that I will never accomplish the vision.

      I understand interpretation and perception, which is something that comes with writing. However, it is another to create X, when only Y was expressed. In other words, the post did not relate to the response you posted. What I expressed, is different from what you gathered based on your response. That is completely fine of course…I simply wanted to make that clear.

      In your example, I would thank the person (grandma) for creating the problem, and the grandson for devising a solution to her problem. Your reply shows there is a disconnect with the “negative-minded” individual I am writing about in this post, and what you gathered. The grandma in your example is not negative-minded, in the sense that I described in this post.

      There is a saying from my elders and many others, where you can “love from a distance.” I can help you from a distance, without you actively involved in my life. It is not up to me for someone to change. That task is up to them, when they are ready to tackle this journey. Your opinion is to keep destructive individuals in your life, and that is perfectly fine. On the other hand, I realize at my young age that time is precious. I rather spend it with those more deserving of the time.

      In my opinion, destructive individuals do not belong in my life. To clarify again, feeling “negative” is not the same as a “negative-minded” or a destructive person, in the manner I pointed out in the post. This is not simply because someone is not optimistic all the time. My post goes deeper than simply lacking 24/7 optimism. This is about people who take joy in your failures, wish for your failures, etc


  9. Great post! Its strange how difficult it can be to identify the negative forces in your life let alone uproot them. In my case for example, there isnt a single person I know how appreciates my downfall, but at the same time I am sure theres someone out there who does…I guess this is when your optimism and faith in people/universe blinds you (in a good way though :))

    Liked by 1 person

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