The Fallacy That Nice Guys Finish Last (1/2)

nice guys finish last
Shared by One Gentleman.

Nice guys finish last.

I’m single because she only likes bad boys.

Boys and men alike, I am going to need you to put down the Xbox and PlayStation controllers, turn off Netflix or hit pause on the Mayweather fight. I need your complete and undivided attention. This is serious, so pull up a chair and listen closely. Women do not owe you a bloody thing. Shocking, right? No! It is not shocking…it is the reality.

I was going to continue my previous post, but sometimes you get inspiration that may place your attention in a different direction.

Guys have been using a common response for far too long, whenever things go wrong in their relationship, or pursuit towards a relationship. As a gentleman, I will admit I have made excuses while younger. As I have said in the past, as a boy, you will think as a boy should. However, when you become a man, you will begin to assess situations as a man.

I am pleading with males to stop with this blame game rational. You use a nonsensical excuse, by saying XYZ happened because nice guys finish last.

Wait a minute, get back in your seat and pay attention. If you can listen attentively and laugh at the faults of women, you better listen closely when others address yours.

She did not reject you because you are too nice…that may have been her conscious wording, but that is not the reason on a subconscious level. Sometimes, we say with our mouths, what we cannot convey with our genuine thoughts. This nice guy crutch is an overused and utterly abused line, by far too many guys.

Today, through One Gentleman’s Perspective, I want to put the line out if its misery.

So, you are a nice guy and none of the ladies can stand having a nice guy as their partner. That is the excuse as to why you are single. Did I get that correct? None of this is of your own shortcomings…nope; it is entirely because you are too much of a nice guy.

What the heck is a nice guy? When you try to locate an academic related definition, you will have difficulty finding many. Nonetheless, there seems to be a positive and negative interpretation for someone who is a nice guy.

When you interpret nice guy through a positive perspective, it implies a male who puts the needs of others before his own, avoids confrontations, does favors, gives emotional support, tries to stay out of trouble, and generally acts nicely towards others. In the context of a relationship, it may also refer to traits of honesty, loyalty, romanticism, courtesy and respect.

Are you serious? This is the description of a nice guy and you want me to believe a woman will detest a male with these traits. Really?

I have platonic relationships with women and read articles through the perspective of women. Why is the female perspective important to One Gentleman? It is simple really. If there is something I desire to learn, I prefer going directly to the source. When you rid yourself of an ego and simply listen, you learn a lot. In fact, I learn a great deal from women by using my two ears…you should try it.

The positive interpretation above, of the so-called nice guy; that is the blueprint for what I read, hear and see with my own eyes, that women typically desire from a partner.

I can see you do not believe me. That is fine. I want you to list the number of logical-minded women in your life, who have mentioned the following:

  • Gosh, I just hate my husband. He actually sits down, listens and gives me emotional support, after I’ve expressed a bad day at the office.
  • I hate the fact that my boyfriend chips in to do the dishes, without me asking.
  • Is my fiance serious? I can’t believe he doesn’t start fights with random strangers while we are out. Urgh! He’s such a nice guy.

How many names did you list thus far? You could not list one name…really. You mean to tell me that a woman actually likes when her partner listens whenever she speaks, assists in household chores without her forcing, and stays out of trouble while in public. Wow! I would never imagine this.

Sarcasm aside, it is amazing the length guys will go in order to place blame elsewhere, as opposed to accepting their role in the matter. Whenever you hear a guy use the excuse from this day forth, say one thing in response;explain to me your interpretation of a nice guy.

There seems to be a philosophy going around these days, and I call it Lack of Accountability-ism. Men have it, women have it and both refuse to accept they follow this ideology, yet practice everything it stands for.

Now, with this positive interpretation out-of-the-way, join me next time as we continue our journey dismantling the nice guy excuse, by assessing the negative definition.

Until then, if you are a so-called nice guy, I need you to begin listing everything else about yourself, that many would consider a girl repellent. By the time your list ends, there is a high probability that your relationship woes, will boil down to at least one of those issues.

 

…to be continued

Do you love to write? If you have a story, article, post about dating or love, please Share your Heartbeat! We would love you feature your writing.

Thank you!

Advertisements