Empty Chairs (Don’t You Dare Sit Down)
Shared by Miss Parisia B.
Doors stretch wide open daring you to come in. The room is filled with an endless amount of chairs.
We enter in. Our first memory.
Each time we enter we try a different seat. The first day we sat on embrace. It held us and comforted us. It showed us both what it felt like to be touched by someone you love. And when we got up we still felt every embrace. It still replays. The next day we sat in friendship. It was fun. It brought us laughter and hope. We got so close it was equivalent to approaching the sun. Every advancement grew hotter and friendship melted away. When we returned to those daring doors, we had no choice but to sit in love. When we sat down it was a different chair. No chair like we had ever been in this far. It was deeper. It whispered melodies and made promises. It embraced fear and wiped away pain. It showed us its inner four walls and memorized our weaknesses.
We stopped going for a while. We were caught up in other things. We were too busy being hurt to love one another. But when we returned our seat had been taken every time by those who were inspired by our imprint.
(It’s hard to find inspiration when your standing so close to regret).
When our seat was open once again, after months of waiting, and praying; I was reluctant to go back. So we sat somewhere else. We sat in guilt. I blamed myself for giving up the seat of friendship. So did you. Guilt soon turned into our own table. There were chairs added and full service shame waited on our hand and foot. I guess it knew we’d be there for a while.
I was stuck. But for some reason It was all ok. It was okay because I had you with me. You sat in the same seat and that comforted me. But sometimes you sat across from me…blaming me.
Why? How could you not understand I was scared to stay in the same chair, it frightened my very being. You see there is a chair that sits in the basement of my house. In that chair my parents sat for 14 years and with all that time and experience pilled on…it broke.
I didn’t want us to break. But you left before we could.
Yes, sometimes I sat in the chair of distance, in the chair of hurt, hell, in the chair of not even liking you. But I always loved you. Cant you see I needed you to sit in the chair next to me? What was it called again…strength.
I’m haunted by this place.
But still everyday I return and sit in the unfinished chair. It reminds me of my life and how there is so much for me to unfold. It gives me hope that there is an endless possibility for my future. But it also devastates my soul. It reminds me of my inability to finish what I started. My inability to love you. You see this place isn’t just somewhere filled with chairs. This place holds our memories. After every fight, every event, after every late night, we always came here. And not for its good company and good food, but because our hearts were full and we needed somewhere else to store the love. So we left it here. In each chair.
If I could go anywhere in the world. I would go there. Not to remember you, but to create new memories apart from you. Because If this place remains our safe, it would become my favorite place.
And we all fear loving something that really isn’t there… at least I do.
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