Reblog: Miss Independent
While I don’t want to reblog too many posts encouraging people to be alone sometimes in a relationship blog (lol), it is definitely important to reflect and learn to love yourself.
A strong independent woman can be very attractive. Jessica had some great words for doing things for yourself. Oh, and I think it definitely applies to guys too. Please enjoy!
“The smartest thing a woman can ever learn, is to never need a man.” -Demi Lovato.
The quote above, is probably one of my all-time favorite quotes ever because, it is true. This post will be addressed towards independence, and how dramatically life changes when you put yourself first, and put your priorities in order, rather than worrying about other things. What attracts me the most to a man, and is a huge factor in whether I pursue him or not, is when he has a destination for where he wants to go and has a path drawn out in his head of how he is going to get there.
“Don’t be a woman that needs a man… Be a woman a man needs.”
This ties in with the quote above, because I believe that you cannot start a life with somebody else, without having yours first. We all were put on this earth to bring value and leave something here, and I think that when we mold and perfect ourselves, we allow ourselves to attract the good things in life, and allow for everything else to fall in place. What’s one of the common reasons people give their partners when they are breaking up with them? They feel like they aren’t going down the same path and have different goals in life. Well to me, that’s why a good head on a persons shoulders is so attractive to me. A guy likes an independent woman, and I think prioritizing and having your life in order, along with your goals and dreams, is so attractive. Who doesn’t want someone who is going somewhere?
“He offered her the world, she said she had her own.”
“I am not a princess, I don’t need saving. I am a queen, I got this sh*t handled.”
I just recently entered this stage, shortly after a breakup, and not because this breakup hurt me or made me hate the boy population, but because it gave me the chance to open my eyes and realize that there is a much larger array of things to concentrate on and excel in, rather than boys, and that’s where my Metanoia began.
“Metanioa- (n.) the journey of changing one’s mind, heart, self, or way of life.”
“And then all of a sudden she changed. She came back a completely different person, with a new mindset, a new outlook, a new soul.”
I began to change my mindset, my goals and my priorities, with myself and my future as the central motivation. I told myself that from that day on, I would do at least one thing everyday, that would benefit me and make me different than the person I was yesterday. This completely changed my life. It was really nothing against guys specifically, they just have always been a distraction to me. But I realized that the true “win” in life today isn’t finding love…it’s creating yourself. Like I said earlier, once you create yourself, you’re bound to find your other half. Think of it sort of like, you can’t find your perfect match, until you yourself are perfected and will then find that one that’s fit for you.
“Be like snow, beautiful but cold.”
I love this quote because it displays my mindset perfectly. During this change of attitude of mine, I did decide to become somewhat “cold” in the manner of not allowing myself to enter a relationship or get involved with them, simply due to the fact that I wanted to continue doing me, and perfecting myself, until I thought it was adequate to look for someone. I was happy doing my life in benefit to myself, and was making my life “beautiful” in my eyes; that I felt absoloutly no need to please anyone else with my life but myself.
“The smarter the woman is, the more difficult it is to find the right man.”
I obviously don’t plan on being single forever, but I do believe that once I make my life the way I want it, and am satisfied with the accomplishments I have done and have fulfilled enough goals, the correct guy that will continue to encourage my goals and accept my lifestyle, will come.
I believe that these years of my life, my college years, are here to develop me, and are giving me the time to do whatever I want with my life, and so I plan to take advantage of it; and make sure when I’m done, I have no regrets and as many little “I should” or “I could haves”. I want to take everything I can out of life for myself, because at the end of the day, I’m the one who’s gunna have to live with my life.
“At the end of the day the person who has to be happy is me.” – Miley Cyrus.
What I want you all to take out of this post is that priorities will make or break you. There’s plenty of time to love, but there’s limited time to mold yourself for your future and time flies, so choose your time wisely. Don’t stress over things that won’t matter a year from now. Instead look on the positive side of everything. Like me, with my breakup: “Now I can do things for myself, every second of every day. I can make my dream body by working out and eating healthy. Studying extra so that I can get all A’s and master my classes. I can improve my mind, the person I am, and work on my faith. Become closer to God, and make that relationship the most important one, Etc.” There are endless possibilities in this life, and I truly believe anything you want is possible if you put all your heart, mind, and time into it. As cliche as that sounds, it’s true.
Everyday do something your future self will thank you for. And never need anyone.
You yourself are more than enough.
You can visit the original blog post here.